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  • JBGT50
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    New Mustang rear lights

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  • JBGT50
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    Originally posted by mick the hat View Post

    Is that off the front of a G Wagon?
    Its on the front of most G spots

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  • mick the hat
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    Is that off the front of a G Wagon?

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  • JBGT50
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  • JBGT50
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    A man walked out to the street and caught a taxi just going by. He got into the taxi, and the cabbie said, "Perfect timing. You're just like Brian!"

    Passenger: "Who?"

    Cabbie: "Brian Sullivan. He's a guy who did everything right all the time. Like my coming along when you needed a cab, things happen like that to Brian Sullivan, every single time."

    Passenger: "There are always a few clouds over everybody."

    Cabbie: "Not Brian Sullivan. He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the Grand Slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera baritone and danced like a Broadway star and you should have heard him play the piano. He was an amazing guy."

    Passenger: "Sounds like he was something really special."

    Cabbie: "There's more. He had a memory like a computer. He remembered everybody's birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order and which fork to eat them with. He could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out. But Brian Sullivan, he could do everything right."

    Passenger: "Wow. Some guy then."

    Cabbie: "He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid traffic jams. Not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But Brian, he never made a mistake, and he really knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good. He would never answer her back even if she was in the wrong; and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly polished too. He was the perfect man! He never made a mistake. No one could ever measure up to Brian Sullivan."

    Passenger: "An amazing fellow. How did you meet him?"

    Cabbie: "Well, I never actually met Brian. He died. I'm married to his xxxxing widow."

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  • macstang
    replied
    I'm being haunted by the ghost of an angry chicken, it's a poultrygeist

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  • macstang
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    I've just seen the ghost of Gloria Gaynor, first I was afraid I was petrified

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  • yanktankmad
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    There is a Ford for Every............

    Great skills here ! Click image for larger version

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  • irocfan
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  • irocfan
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  • irocfan
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    While riding my Harley, I swerved to avoid the hitting a deer, lost control and landed in a ditch, severely banging my head.
    Shaken and confused I crawled out of the ditch to the edge of the road when a shiny new Corvette convertible pulled up with a very beautiful women who asked, "Are you okay?"
    As I looked up, I noticed she was wearing a low cut blouse with cleavage to die for...
    "I'm okay I think," I replied as I pulled myself up to the side of the car to get a closer look.
    She said, "Get in and Ill take you home so I can clean and bandage that nasty scrape on your head."
    "That's nice of you," I answered, but I don't think my wife will like me doing that!
    "Oh, come now, Im a nurse," she insisted. "I need to see if you have any more scrapes and then treat them properly."
    Well, she was really pretty and very persuasive. Being sort of shaken and weak, I agreed, but repeated,
    "I'm sure my wife won't like this."
    We arrived at her place which was just few miles away and, after a couple of cold beers and the
    Bandaging, I thanked her and said, "I feel a lot better but I know my wife is going to be really upset so I'd better go now."
    "Don't be silly!" she said with a smile, while unbuttoning her blouse exposing the most beautiful set of
    boobs Ive ever seen. "Stay for a while. She won't know anything. By the way, where is she?"
    "Still in the ditch with my Harley, I guess."

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  • irocfan
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  • irocfan
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    Pull over the curb, said the policeman. Your rear light is not working.

    The motorist stepped out, looked in back of the car, and stood quivering and speechless.

    Oh, its not that bad, said the policeman.

    The man mumbled, Its not the rear light I am worried about. Where's my wife and trailer?

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  • irocfan
    replied
    I got called pretty yesterday and it felt good! Actually, the full sentence was "You're pretty annoying." but I'm choosing to focus on the positive.

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  • macstang
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    I went to the chemist and asked if they had anything to clear up diarrhoea. The assistant said we have immodium. I replied I don't think you understand I've just sh*t on the floor

    A weasel goes into a bar the barman says we've never had a weasel in before what do you want it's on the house. Pop goes the weasel

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